The Musing of Cruisin' Suzan.

I never seem to get around to writing in here.

I do have some good news. I think I may have met someone special!

He makes me go all squee inside! I just hope its proper squee and not just "i haven't been laid in a while" squee.

He is very romantic he took me on this gorgeous picnic date on the weekend and I haven't been able to think of anything, or anyone, else since.
I have so much work to do but I'm too happy to bother.

Yay!

bleugh!

I feel so crappy at the moment. I hate being sick so much!
Especially when I have work to do! Got time off paid work but I'm at that awful point where I'm not sick enough to get out of assignments but I'm too sick to do them.

Met a nice fella the other night too. Great time to get sick! Being holed up at home with a box of tissues is not where I want to be!

On the other hand I think my life is on the improve. Strangely the death of my friends fionce has really made me think about my life.  What I really want. I feel like I've forgiven a lot of people that I never thought I would forgive, including my two most recent exs. I guess I've started to feel that life is too short for grudges. If a healthy successful man can go missing suddenly , then I certainly could. I could die tomorrow. I want to feel that I've done my best.

Things have started to improve lately.
After being away so long, it can be hard to settle back at home. But i seem to finally be doing it. Discarding crappy boyfriend and enjoying my freedom.

Working long hours though. One of the managers at work lost her fionce last weekend. He went missing and everyone has presumed he drowned. My heart breaks for her. I wish there was something I could do to help......I mean aside from taking on her shifts.

This doesn't sound much like things have improved.

I guess facing the future is always bloody hard. especially when you have no idea of what you're doing next.

Maybe I'll just run away and travel again.

It has been so long time since I wrote in here. just always lurking looking at groups and such.....but so much has happened. Had my heart broken several times by the one guy (stupid me!), moved house, lost my family to other towns.

I feel a bit like a ship without an anchor.

This is an odd feeling to say the least.....I've always been a homie type. I love family and curling up at home but now it is like i have no home...... :(


sigh

YOUR PORN STAR NAME (Name Of First Pet + 1st Street You Live On):
Tinkerbell McClean

YOUR MOVIE STAR NAME (Name Of Your Favourite Snack Food + Grandfather's First Name):
Peanut Bob

YOUR FASHION DESIGNER NAME (First Word You See On Your Left + Favourite Restaurant):
Scarlet Chopsticks

EXOTIC FOREIGNER ALIAS (Favorite Spice + Last Foreign Vacation Spot):
Ginger Bailleul

ICON ALIAS (Something Sweet Within Sight + Any Liquid in Kitchen):
Muffin Milk

DETECTIVE ALIAS (Favorite Baby Animal + Where You Went to High School):
Kitty Roona

BARFLY ALIAS (Last Snack Food You Ate + Your Favorite Alcoholic Drink):
Muffin Baileys

ROCK STAR ALIAS (Favorite Candy + Last Name Of Favorite Musician):
Sourz Fitzgerald

He came home!
a little bedraggled and morose, but he's home.
I wish i believed in a deity so I could thank someone.

who knew this would get so emo so soon.....

someone very special to me has disappeared, forever. he was old. he went away, i assume, to die.

I saw him born, i saw him grow, i saw him fade away, and now he's gone.

My brain is sticky with grief and worry. It rained so hard last night and its been so cold. i hope he found shelter.

My dark, gentle, spirited angel.

I have to search for him today...

at least if I find him I'll know.

Yay! I've finally started my journal after just reading everyone's for so long!
Hope I remember to write in here because I hate it when people never write. It will be hard though because I'm so busy with uni. Feel free to friend me, especially if I friend you:)

Hope i think of something to write in here soon.....

suzan.